Wishing Steve Byers a Very Happy Birthday

Usually, I avoid singing in public. Singing is NOT my forte. Today though, I've made an exception for Steve Byers' birthday. 

Steve--if you're reading this, remember that question I asked you about your stance on mediocre karaoke :)

Anyway, I wrote an, I'm certain never-to-be-produced music video for Steve.  It's to the tune of "I'm a Survivor" as I had the Alvin & the Chipmunks version of the song stuck in my head while creating lyrics.

At the end of this post is a "script sheet" listing lyrics, camera notes, & stage directions for what is in my head for all the stuff I couldn't show in the video I put together.

I figured it'd be hard to imagine how the lyrics went with the melody though, so I broke my long-standing tradition of NOT being recorded singing and went out on a limb to try and make Steve laugh on his birthday.

So, without further ado, Happy Birthday Steve! Here is a video mock-up, but please check out the "script" & associated notes below as well  :) 

To the tune of “I’m a Survivor”

Verse 1:

*Steve is standing at the railing of a large ship looking out over the ocean at night, singing*

For my birthday

I just want a dragon    *Balloon over Steve's head with image of dragon flying*

A dragon I said and not a kraken

A kraken would eat me up in just one bite  *Kraken rises out of the sea, tentacles wrap around Steve & he's lifted into the air, still singing*

Even my socks and shoes and skinny jeans that fit tight 

Chorus:

*Edge of screen is all fuzzy, dreamy & Steve is riding on the back of a flying dragon*

For my birthday

I just want a dragon

Yes, a dragon

And not a kraken

He’d take me flying

Around the globe

I’d have a blast

Just me and my girls *Steve and his wife & kids are now all on the back of an enormous dragon, still flying over beautiful, green landscape*

Verse 2:

Only a dragon for my birthday will do

Yes that’s a dragon for me

Or maybe two  *Steve is standing in between two dragons, petting one with each hand, in a forest somewhere. Photography still looks dreamy*

Above clouds and treetops we would fly *Cut to Steve riding on a dragon again, weaving in & out of clouds, still singing*

As fast as sound can travel

No need to ask why

Verse 3:

My pet dragon

Couldn’t change the weather *Steve is now standing outside his house and we see his snow-covered yard.  Dragon is next to him.  Heavy snow is falling on both of them.*

But my dragon

Could do even better

I would fly straight south *Cut to image of Steve in shorts, barefoot, riding dragon over a tropical paradise*

That much is true

I’d hang out on the sand

With a cold beer or two. *Dragon lands. Steve lounges on beach, drinking beer*

Verse 4:

My dragon would have shiny scales *Cut to Steve and dragon in a huge dragon stable. Steve is polishing the dragon much like you'd shine & polish a car. Dragon is smiling, looking goofy*

I’d groom him every moment that I'm able

My commute would be so more much fun

When I show up on the set *Dragon flies downward with Steve on back. Steve is dressed like a 1940's movie star with the silk scarf, sunglasses, & hat. Dragon lands. A hundred old-fashioned cameras with the big, bright bulbs flash.*

My dragon would be the only one

Verse 5:

For my birthday I just want a dragon

He wouldn’t eat me up like would a kraken *Cut to Steve back at sea, kraken pulling him under water.  He's still singing even though this is technically impossible since, well, you can't sing under water.*

I’d be the talk of the town

I’m telling you

I’d be the hit of the party

Mobile barbecue *Cut to neighborhood block party scene.  Dragon is breathing fire & people are roasting hot dogs & marshmallows & making s'mores*

Verse 6: 

*Party scene continues, but in background.  Now we have a second singer out front, yours truly, only I look like I did at age 18 & I'm wearing a black & green cheerleader uniform*

I’m not a singer

I am a writer

A little crazy

But then you know that

And now I wish you

A happy birthday

Hoping I made you laugh

And that you have a great day!


Get your daily laugh following Steve on Twitter @TheSteveByers and you can also keep up with when he'll be on TV, etc., by following @SteveByersFans (a fan Twitter thing run by yours truly.)